Lo que la mIerda, my fandom said.
NOTICE THIS IS A PARODY, BUT ITS NOT A POTSHOT! General Information *'Title:' Lo que la mlerda, my fandom said. *'Author(s):' Democratic Cheesecake *'Genre(s):' Humor/Horror *'Date of Publication:' Feburary 5th, 2012 *'Story Rating:' T *'Status:' In-Progress The Story It all started when Jayfeather swimming in the lake, and then firestar showed up. "Hey you, aren't you supposed to like, help cats?" said Firestar. "Nah, I got bored of that, I'm going fishing!" Replied Jayfeather. "It's not like a serial killer is destroying the kits den." "Well, there IS a serial killer destroying the den!" "OH CRAP! Thanks for telling me, I'll be right on my way!" "Ha, no. I Lied." "What the crap, Firestar?" And Firestar laughed. Minutes later, Jayfeather goes to the medical den, and sat there, mumbling to himself about his plot to kill Firestar. "If that punk joked to me one more time, I'll rip his neck off. And then I will EAT his own stomach!" growled Jayfeather. "But how?, well I can ask Siri!" "I'm just here for product placement." said Siri. "Oh your damn useless!" "Now don't treat me like clippy." "How did you get here anyway?" "Product Placeme-" And before Siri can complete his sentence, Jayfeather ate Siri. "Oh yeah?" said a voice. "Huh?" "It's me, Tamama, and I'll rip YOUR neck off!" "WHAT?" And Tamama rips his neck off, then Tamama goes to Firestar. "Hey, Jayfeather wanted to kill you!" said Tamama. "Really?" said Firestar. "BUT I KILLED HIM!" "Oh, well, whatever." "But I saved you from murder." "Jayfeather always wanted to kill me, but always fails to do so." "But why did he want to kill you?" "Because," sighed Firestar. "I keep making jokes." "What kind of jokes?" said Tamama. "75% of the time, it's about the clan being under attack, the other 25% is about Deadmau5." "But wait, why are you joking about that?" "Because I'm bored." "Not all jokes are funny. Jokes about Salad Fingers is funny, but People destroying the clan isn't funny." "Well, I can joke about Salad Fingers more." And Tamama walked to the kits den to see if they are okay, even though Firestar joked about it, and the kits got worried, even though the she-cats went to the lake to swim, which of course has something to do with their pelt. "Well everything seems to be okay." said Tamama. "Hey Siri, is there any serial killers in the forest?" "Well, of course not, you killed one of them, but then again, I'm just here for product placement." Said Siri. Then Tamama was surprised, not because Siri is an product placement for Apple, but because Siri was, well, no one knows why Apple decided to have that in a forest, But then again the writer was just watching The Amazing Race when he ran out of ideas, and Of course forgotten this fanfic until now. But hey, no one knows why he forgotten this- "Shut up!" said Firestar. "Who are talking to?" said Tamama. "That damn writer!" shouted Firestar. "He doesn't need to explain the plot holes!" "But wait, does this mean that this fanfic is Ruined?" "Of course, but let's walk to where you live, just in case I go crazy and the writer threw up." After that, Firestar gets killed by Jayfeather, and the Tamama and Jayfeather walked into a Hollister Co. And pretend nothing happened. "So, you think you've killed me, huh?" said Jayfeather. "Maybe, but hey, Firestar said that he joked too much, Right?" said Tamama. "Yeah, duh!" replied Jayfeather. "But what about your clan?" "Well, My clan is the only clan there is, since Shadowclan was burned to the ground by someone." "Well who was it?" "I don't know." "Is it Jimmy Hopkins?" guessed Tamama. "No..." Said Jayfeather. "Faith?" "No..." "Murdoc?" "No." "Deadmau5?" "No." "Clippy?" "No!" "Nitrome?" "No!" "Salad Fingers?" "NO!" "Well what is it?" "It was Firestar!" "That's it, gonna beat you up if you don't tell the damn truth!" And Tamama punched him In the face, then Jayfeather scratched his face, then Tamama threw him into a bunch of perfume. "Oh it's on." said Jayfeather. Then Jayfeather killed 2 teens, and tried to kill an emo, but Tamama stabbed Jayfeather with a Table leg just before he killed the emo. "You've think you're clever, huh punk?" said Tamama. Then Tamama chased Jayfeather from the Hollister Co. And into a Brookstone. "Oh you are so going to die!" Said Jayfeather. Then Tamama killed him by stabbing his belly 9 times with a steak knife. "Try harder." Growled Tamama. Then a mother of a baby came in and tried to call 911, but Tamama managed to cut her head off with the same steak knife. "Sorry, but I won't allow you to call 911, since you can't be strong enough!" said Tamama. Then Tamama went into the food court to Steal a gun from a burglar. "I bought stuff once, but then I took an arrow to the knee." said the burglar. "Well take a bullet to the 'HEAD!'" yelled Tamama. Then Tamama shot the Burglar in the Head. And the Buglar died. Just so you know that he tried to rob a Spencer's. The policeman walked up to Tamama and said "Oh that's it, come with us!" "No loser, you can't escape me once you're near me!" yelled Tamama. Then Tamama shot him In the knee then another through the face with the AK-47 he stole from the burglar. "What do you think I am, you worthless piece of crap?" said Tamama. Then Tamama cut the policemans hand off, and threw the hand at an another policeman, then Tamama threw the steak knife at the mans stomach. Tamama then grabbed his stomach and threw it at 2 girls. One of the girls puked, and the other girl shot in the neck. "YOU WILL ALL DIE!" said Tamama. And Tamama goes on to kill 97 people in the mall, and apparently 9 of them were workers from Restraunts. "HEY YOU!" What? "Stop Talking when I kill, or you will DIE!" But wait. "What?" I think it's time for FILMOGRAPHY OF RANDOM PEOPLE! "What?!" Nevermind, let start this over. "HEY YOU!" What? "Stop Talking when I kill, or you will DIE!" Oh, so now let me put a copyrighted song on here. (Privte Eyes by Hall & Oates starts playing.) I see you, you see me watch you blowin' the lines when you're making a scene Oh girl, you've got to know what my head overlooks the senses will show to my heart when it's watching for lies you can't escape my Private Eyes they're watching you they see your every move Private Eyes they're watching you Private Eyes they're watching you watching you watching you watching you You play with words you play with love you can twist it around baby that ain't enough cause girl I'm gonna know if you're letting me in or letting me go don't lie when you're hurting inside 'cause you can't escape my Private Eyes they're watching you they see your every move Private Eyes they're watching you Private Eyes they're watching you watching you watching you watching you Why you try to put up a front for me I'm a spy but on your side you see Slip on, into any disguise I'll still know you look into my Private Eyes THIS IS NOT FINISHED! Check back for more. Category:Fan Fiction